What is fob la?

I had an amusing time at work the other day trying to explain what a fob was one of my fellow honky co-workers. Have you ever had to describe what a fob is ... to a fob?

Let that thought settle in for a moment ...

How do you even begin?

"Um ... theres er.. a boat you see. Well, theres quite a few of them, a long time ago. And asians used to go on them to get away from their own country. But they don't really do the boat thing anymore - but thats kind of beside the point - its more like they spoke funny and now you're stuck with this label. So we kind of call those asians ... er, fresh off the boat ... yeah fresh - no, no not like vegetables ..."

So the conversation getting confusing already, and no doubt slightly offensive - that is if they've understood what you mean so far.

Then I got to the stage where I had to describe these so-called fobs.

"The older male species of the fob tends to adorn himself in characteristically light blue jeans, tennis shoes, and a white polo shirt. The younger types ... like they wear tight stuff. Especially the guys. And tight tops. Yeah, kinda like the top you're wearing. Oh, and really colourful stuff too - especially if they're Honky. And they kinda talk like ... Why harlo my lame is Circle and it was so very good to be meeting you today on this fine morning and I love to eat watemelon. When the man on the street turn green you can go-go-go! How many peepo?"

Before the person in front of me had any idea what I was crappin on about, I quickly changed topics and managed to convince them that everyone in Australia wears opals and drinks Fosters.

Incidentally, Wikipedia defines a fob as this,

Fresh off the boat (often abbreviated as F.O.B., FOB or freshie, or fobbie) is a slang phrase applied to people of foreign nationality, who have arrived in an English-speaking nation as tourists or, most commonly, as work permit applicants.

Derivative adjective forms of FOB include fobby, fobbish and fobulous, a portmanteau of fob and fabulous.


How fobulous.